Starting university can be daunting and scary but an experience you will always remember – and a good memory too, not like reading back through old MySpace or Facebook messages that make your face hurt with constant cringing! University opens the doors to so many new experiences, like meeting all kinds of people, how to manage working and studying and lets not to forget, growing up.
1 – Pass the Cleanex
You will be tearful; Big time. Right, I know some of you out there – especially you guys lifting weights as you read this – think otherwise, but as Fresher’s Week will be the best week of your life, it will most certainly be the hardest. Even if you will be out every night sharing a Jagerbomb with all the people you will spend the next year with, at one point it will hit you; homesickness. Dealing with homesickness is essential when you’re at university as it may be some time until you’re able to visit home. You may not know why you are crying or don’t think you feel homesick but it almost certainly is. The late nights – actually early mornings – won’t help with this. You’re tired, grumpy, and you have spent your whole week allowance on shots that look like the colours of the American Flag, and it can get to you. So, if you do find yourself crying at the cat in a shark costume riding a mobility hoover, just find some alone time, let it all out – watch the video on repeat if it helps – until it is all out. You will feel ten times better. Now, splash your face with water, apply some more make-up and head back to the SU. I find pretending to finish yawning or laughing hysterically great at deceiving your friends.
2 – You’ll Forget Your Parents
“Yes mum, I’ll call you every morning and text you when I get in at night. I promise.” Does that sound familiar? Well if it does, you won’t keep those promises. As a suggestion, maybe just nod when she asks you to Skype her every other day if you feel bad? If you think you only have one life and that all your family and friends from home will still be a big part of it once you start your course, think again! You will become a superhero, with an alter ego, but you won’t need to design a costume – unless you really want to! There will be your ‘University Life’ and your ‘Home Life’ and you will teleport between the two. When September comes around University will take up a lot of your time and effort so keeping in touch can be difficult. Don’t fret; there are Christmas and Summer holidays and reading weeks where you can catch up with them. Most of the time they will be busy too so don’t worry. The relationships that are meant to last will and every time you see each other again it will seem like only a night has passed instead of 3 months.
3 – Naptime is all the time
Morning and afternoon are words that you will have to delete from your vocabulary and cross out in your new, unopened, Oxford Dictionary. You’ll find that the Sun is that much too bright for you and are craving cheesy dough balls at 2:15 in the morning. You will miss lectures and you will consider getting a taxi from your dorm to your lecture 6 minutes away. Everything just makes you tired at University – going out every night doesn’t help – and you will find when you go back home for the summer or get a Temp job at Christmas you will hit the snooze button for a least an hour.
4 – The Games
Prank wars between you, your friends and Uni housemates will take place and most probably be posted online. You won’t know who will be doing the pranking when you first meet everyone at Freshers because they’re all your BFF’s the first week. But once everything has settled down, and you have so many new contacts in your phone that you just can’t work out who they are, like, Fish and Pie, or KK, the games will commence. Some favourite pranks to keep an eye out for:
• Watch out for cling film over the toilet seat, always look out for clingfilm on the toilet seat…
• Tin foil over everything you own.
• Food and stuff left right outside your door.
• String tied across opposing doors so that when someone opens their door, the other closes, you’re trapped!
• People moving your things around to drive you crazy!
Happy Pranking Games! And may the odds be ever in your favour…
5 – Your Parents Will Only Be Remembered When They Become Your Second Bank
You will check your Phone Log and realise your mum has called you every day for the past 5 nights. You were busy, ‘studying’; she guesses and leaves a lovely polite voicemail where you can hardly hear her fighting back the tears and sniffing. But week 5 into the term, one month after your Student Loan gave your bank account a smiley face and your card bounced at the Local Chinese Takeaway. This must be a mistake, right? You haven’t been spending that much, have you? You only bought a few things off of eBay, and you really needed that shower curtain that looked like someone had been murdered in the bathroom. There will be so many transfers from your parent’s account to your own that you will know your account and sort code number off by heart. The best advice is to set a weekly allowance, and not to get into too much trouble. Check your balance and spending every week and work out what is costing you the most, if it is food, travel or most likely, drinking and going out. Remember, the loan isn’t ‘free money’ and any other loans you might get too. You do have to pay it back and this will be the hardest thing to master when you go to University.
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